Thursday, February 26, 2009

Marx and Hegel walk into a bar...and I kick their asses!

Marx and Hegel sitting in a tree: M-S-I-I-S-M
OR: How I Coined A New Word
By
Joel Straley

That's right, I've coined a new word. The word is Msiism (pronounced: Mmmmm-sizm). If it helps think of it like someone describing a delicious circumcision.

Marx, the one with the beard and not the glasses and mustache, has stated that Hegel was "standing on his head" when he wrote his dialectic theory and Marxist Dialectics aimed to put him back on his feet. If Hegel is standing on his head, then Marx has his head in the clouds. Marxism puts all faith in science and suggest that everything can be explained through matter.

In Das Kapital he states: "The ideal is nothing else than the material world reflected by the human mind, and translated into forms of thought". Hegel argues the opposite, that it is our consciousness that determines our existence and is reflected in the material world. You can see where when viewed in simpler terms its sort a chicken-egg debate about our consciousness and the perception of the material world.

Hegelian dialectic involves three stages: Thesis, Antithesis and synthesis. As is made clear by Marx's attempt to put Hegel back on his head his Dialectic theory is an antithesis to the view of Hegel. It should seem obvious through the empirical evidence that comes from being a conscious human being that neither can be completely correct, and thus the truth behind these Dialectic views is that we exist in a synthesis of both ideas.

For Marx I suggest that a baby born deaf and blind is forced to create a perception of the material world through her mind first. Although Marx is notorious for constructing his viewpoints with the bigger picture in mind, it should be obvious that not all individuals in any social situation or material confinement ever think in the same way. However I will agree that our social conditions do generally condition groups to think similarly, which has much to do with my definition for Msiism.

I don't want to switch arguments but I am always put off by other atheist who stubbornly deny and so easily discount a realization of the depth of intimate human interactions that hint at something deeper than the observable material world. For example the buddhist monks who train themselves to use their mind to control their bodily temperature offer, even in the slightest bit, evidence of the mind over the conditions and constraints of the material world.

For Hegel I must concede somewhat to the view of Marx because even a genius cannot strive if they exist in poor economic conditions. No matter how powerful the mind is, it cannot function properly without food. To make this clearer: Food, being of a material nature fuels the mind, which produces and holds ideals and ultimately our consciousness that are clearly of a non-material nature.

Msiism is not necessarily a term for the the synthesis of the Hegelian Dialectic view and Marx's Dialectical materialism. Msiism is a term I am coining that is based on the boring lives led by human beings, something that perhaps comes from the mind they received through birth but is also strongly reinforced by our material conditions and of these the most important being our society or the zeitgeist in which we live. Of course our social conditions that force us to surrender much of our lives for the attainment of success in a world where survival is based in a monetary system plays an enormous role.

To avoid being bored many turn to intellectual pursuits and eventually become known as 'intellectuals' and thus are usually much less boring. They are less boring as they are now less-easily entertained or amused and have become more obsessed with complex, and often existential, issues. These intellectuals begin to question what is around them and begin to stop taking for granted that which was told to them in their youth by the society that surrounded them as they were raised.

They now begin to hold certain ideologies and begin to label themselves by their interests, which usually becomes their 'career' such as sociologist, botanist, or a penis doctor, and also begin labeling themselves by the ideas that they hold such as feminist, Marxist or fascist (assuming one is now so not-boring that they hold the attention of an entire group willing to surrender what they think is best to now live under the rules by which you think is best).

Msiism is a term for the idea that humans are so boring that when forming their own ideals, in an attempt to become one's own self, they attach themselves to the ideologies of others, and more often than not begin amending their own thoughts to now be apart of this group.

Conclusion: Msiism is the belief that humans attempt to be different by upholding their own values, only to sacrifice their individuality by adopting the ideologies of others. Although to be fair they are now apart of a smaller group so in some ways they have become more individualist.

Feel free to agree or disagree but a belief in Msiism is in itself ironic.

And in a world of such uncertainty, split between the ideal and the material perhaps ironic ideologies are the closest truths we can rely one.

In the words of that redneck at that Mccain Rally over the summer when yelling about Barack Obama "get Karl Marx outta heeeereee". But Karl, you know we cool.

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In Other News: As I walked up some stairs after getting off the train I saw a series of scattered 20 dollar bills - probably 100 to 140 dollars total. I had no instinct to pick up the money and even had to think about. The man next to me slightly hesitated and grabbed them. I looked back and he looked up at me, probably assuming I was stupid but more glad I didn't try and fight him for the money.

I don't agree that humans should be lived in a monetary system and always figure someone more greedy or hopefully more needy will pick up the money anyway. I spent the rest of the walk home in shock that this value is so engrained in me that I had no desire whatsoever to pick up the money...and never do, although this is the first time the amount has been so large.

It almost put me in tears to think how different I sometimes find myself from those around me....but not necessarily in a sad way.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

43 vs. 44 by Ralph Wigglesworth


[[Alas, a blog]]

Alright Mr. Interwebs let us compare and contrast shall we? First off, what is the first thing you even noticed when you look at these two photos? That's right its Mr.(You haven't earned President yet, not until you come clean about Larry Sinclair) Obama's smug grin, his "loveable" smirk, the kind of smirk you know Karl Marx always had under his bushy beard (grown to cover-up whiskey breath no doubt). Also, have you noticed Obambi's been getting an increase in gray hairs? This kid's gonna smoke himself into a heart attack before his four years are up. But I digress.

There is he is, the USSA's new Cookie's-n-Cream Czar-in-chief smiling his half-black ass off while hes surrounded by a bunch of old women ("Cookies-n-Cream"is a new colloquialism for "mixed race" I'm trying to start). And Oh MY GoD!they all fucking match, that is ridiculous. He's signing a bill but he looks like he's at a goddamn beanie baby party. I hope this fuckin' bill had a Cathy comic pasted on the front. Its hasn't even been a month and the white house looks like one of those parties where old women wear penis-hats and pretend like they're gonna buy a dildo in front of their friends.

As a side note its no wonder chick-wings are out of stock and Spam is selling like hotcakes, and hotcakes are selling steadily: All of America's lady-force is leaving the kitchen and getting jobs with the government (Nancy Pelosi? more like The Nagger of the House, amirite fellas?). First he wants your wealth and now Obama is after your pussy too! STAND UP MEN!!

On the other hand The President (To NOFX: He's STILL MY President) is showing off how bad-ass his signature is to all his friends. And I can't hate a playa showin' off his game like that, so moving on.

Now lets looks at the bills the President and Mr. Obama are signing. Obamalama-ding-dong is signing an equal pay act for women and this right there should strike a chord about our current Economic crisis (Thanks a lot Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter). Women were getting paid on average 70 cents to ever dollar a man made, and now thanks to some jack-off bill business owners are being PUNISHED for hiring women. All jobs that require women, so I'd assume mostly the receptionist and secretaries industries, now have to have the business owners, or the important men who need secretaries, cut deeper into their profit margins in order to start paying women equally to what men were being paid. So what happens? Well, soon these businesses will have to lie about their profits (Enron), and companies will be forced to ask for bailouts (Auto-manufacturers) and soon an entire mortgage and loan meltdown and before you know it there are tons of layoffs ( Circut City, Microsoft, Starbucks, GE, fuckin' everyone man, we're all dooooommmed!) and our entire economy needs a socialist stimulus package to be saved....and why? All because these women weren't happy with what we gave them and like a bunch of Oliver Twists then went up and twisted Oba-brainless' nipples and pouting out "can we have some more siiiirrrr?"

In fact I may have a solution that will do more to help our economic recovery than any stimulus package ever could (and it couldn't so just cut my fuckin taxes already you commies). I urge you President Mr. Obama to retract that Equal Pay bill and Pass the 2009 Wigglesworth Way-Things-Used-To-Be Act.

Now on the other hand, here you have President Bush surrounded by a bunch of older, white men (Who, by the way if I might add, have controlled the world so far and I think we can all agree its worked pretty well). And these men are fighting for women (and no women even had to ask them!) as they outlaw women from joyfully killing off their young like sick mother rabbits in a creepy discover channel show. Its wrong for you ladies to get such amusement from something us men will never know the pleasure of.

So Compare and Contrast: I don't know about you but when I look back on these pictures after reflecting all I see is: A black Joseph Stalin and Jesus W. Reagan. And I know which side I'm on. (hint: they're called the RIGHT for a reason)

oh, and Mr. O.- GIVE THE REPUBLICANS BACK ABRAHAM LINCOLN!!! He didn't free the blacks so you could steal his legacy!!!

Fuck the assholes on the train

Again, fuck these assholes on the train. The assholes who when you accidentally brush there arm look back and give you a look like "WTF, BRO!" and like they expect to see something other than someone else riding the train who accidentally brushed against their arm.

From now on when one of these assholes looks back and gives me a look like I'm the creep I'm just gonna say "Hey, sexy, how you doing?" and give them a wink. I figure this is what they are expecting to see anyway and I love to fulfill others expectations.

Friday, February 6, 2009

I Want To Be A Model

I want to be a model. I want to stand perfectly still and be loved only for my beauty..beauty not earned but received from chance through birth...loved for my looks alone and not my thoughts.

Like a piece of art.

Its the only way to live forever. People will admire my statuesque beauty, to the point that no one will even realize when I have become deceased. I will be admired as warm flesh showcasing exuberant beauty even as I am dead and decomposing from the inside out right in front of their very eyes.

oh, to be beautiful and fulfill such a vain definition of perfection.

Sunday, February 1, 2009