Friday, November 14, 2008

The Mayans were right: Palin 2012

I have long been a believer in the theory that the Mayan calendar calls for a significant change in the year 2012, whether this be the apocalypse or a mass change in human consciousness. In its defense the Mayan calendar was based on a mathematical circle and didn't have any of that extra-day-every-four-years bullshit. However I will admit that you would think if they were good at predicting things they would of at least attempted to save their own civilization by foreseeing the coming of Europeans with guns.

But now I think I know how it will happen: Palin 2012.

I think things will get better under President Obama. In the words of The Beatles, it couldn't get much worse. It is no secret people love voting for people who are "just like me". I think as things get better the pains of the previous republican administration will fade away. Palin will return in 2012 and Aemricans will go "OMG!! I love this bitch, I can't believe she's back! Lets go get mcdonalds!" And then I believe Palin will finally get here chance and she will win the 2012 election.

And then it will slowly sink into the rest of the world that America just made Sarah Palin the fuckin' President of the United States. And then on December 21,2012 it will finally hit people what exactly this will mean and then BAM!! everyone's head will explode!

....just as the Mayans predicted.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Pres. Obama and the most important election of your lifetime

To all the conservatives bitching today:
I've listened to your crying through your radio hosts, your cable news channel, your blogs and I know that you think your at fault for not going even further to the right.
And it only makes me laugh. (I do hope the rumors of a New separate Neo-Con political party are true). There's a good line from when Truman was running for President and speaking to a group of farmers, who at the time generally voted republican, and said "How many times do you have to be hit by a hammer before you look up and see just who it is that's hitting you?"

When your kids ask you about when the first black man became president are you really going to answer "Well, we were pissed that this socialist, Marxist, terrorist, inexperienced Muslim was gonna come in and destroy the economy, safety and country we had just spent the last 8 years FUCKING UP!!!"

But there is something to look forward to..I know you think that people will see the results of a democratic presidency and it will swing back in your favor, but If you really thought this was true perhaps you shouldn't have spent the last 8 years letting Bush set such low standards for future presidents.

Enlightenment can be a beautiful thing, but its so much better when the rest of the world joins in.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008



Who the fuck is Barack Obama?

Its election day again? And what the fuck is this black guy doing on the ballot?

Kids, go vote -The more ballots there are to try and secretly throw away the harder it will be to not given into the people and just give them what they want.


(and then you can go home and'll be like reward and its another good way to use your freedoms....remember the Taliban doesn't masturbate and look how fucked up they don't wanna be a Talibani do ya?)

But seriously, just like every election this one is coming down to republicans and black people...if you don't vote for Nader who will? just kidding,..remember Nader is older than Mccain and truth be told you know more about Palin than you did his V.P...and you don't even know his V.P's name.

Now go put a boot in their ass...oh and by Go Vote I mean Go Vote Obama, obviously.

Come on, I know you don't wanna see Akon go back to Africa: